Being Honest about your Grief

From 365 Days of Understanding Your Grief, by Alan D. Wolfelt, Ph.D.

As I’ve been grieving, I’ve noticed that I sometimes apologize for being open and honest about my grief. “Sorry I’m such a mess,” I might say after a crying jag in front of a friend. Or, “I’m sorry I need so much help.” But I shouldn’t feel sorry about my normal and necessary grief.

So now I’m switching out sorries for thank-yous:

  • “Thank you for listening to me.” 
  • “Thank you for helping me.”
  • “Thank you for being there for me.”

Thank-yous honor my need to mourn and be supported in my grief. They also extend gratitude to my helpers. So much better! I don’t have to apologize for being genuine.

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