Grief and Loss

            THOUGHTS  TO  PONDER

  • We will never realize how much we have neglected our self until we make our self a priority again.
  • Every time you are tempted to react in the same old way ask yourself “do I want to be a prisoner of the past or a pioneer of the future.”
  • If we only think about what we lost and not about what we had, we’ll just die. So we need to live in the beauty of what their lives were…who they were as human beings because that’s what we celebrate and that’s what we fill our lives with.
  • We cannot change the direction of the wind but we can adjust our sails.
  • We have become real. We have become our true self and there can be no bigger success. They helped us to become this. Once we become real we cannot become unreal again. It lasts for always.
  • Grief is not a mountain to be climbed with the strong reaching the summit long before the weak. Grief is not an athletic event, with stopwatches timing our progress. Grief is a walk through loss and pain with no completion and no time trials.
  • Above all self-care needs to be the most logical thing we give to ourselves.
  • Is grief a way of us taking a time out or just taking a short break from life?
  • REMEMBER—substituting regret for guilt gives us the necessary relief from self-degradation and allows us to grieve more healthily.
  • GRIEF—I had my own notion of grief. I thought it was a sad time that followed the death of someone you loved. AND-you had to push through it to get to the other side. However I am learning there is no other side. There is no pushing through but rather there is absorption, adjustment, and acceptance. Also grief is not something you complete, but rather you endure. Grief is not a task to finish and move on. However it is an element of yourself and alteration of your being a new way of seeing a new definition of self. 
  • The loss we have had to experience will more than likely be one of the most painful lessons we will ever have to learn in our life.
  • My story is mine to tell on my terms and in a manner that honors my loved one and me. Before asking any questions please consider the vast layers of trauma we are having to work through. 
  • Remember to forgive ourselves for not knowing.  We only knew what we knew at the time.
  • There will be bad days with good moments and there will be good days with bad moments. 
  • Remember to concentrate on meeting your own needs when struggling to meet the needs of others.                                                           

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