Pain and suffering are not the same things. This graphic shows how emotional pain (not physical pain) is a natural response to an emotionally disturbing event. Suffering is our response to the event with negative self-talk and actions intended to avoid or numb the pain we feel. We can keep filling that suffering portion of the graphic up with unhealthy coping mechanisms and negative self-talk, but none of them ever address the actual feelings that have caused our pain. In fact, negative self-talk may be another way we avoid feeling the actual pain.