When you lose a loved one to suicide, you can feel completely lost in your pain and grief. You may feel you are completely alone with no roadmap to guide you out of your pain. If you remain open, the guide will appear and the words you need to get you through that next moment, that next day show up when you need them most.
When we lose a loved one to suicide, one of the many questions we grapple with is where are they? Some survivors have found comfort and understanding through listening to stories from people who died and had a near-death experience (NDE) before they were revived. Their experiences share hope and understanding that our loved ones and the love we shared here on earth continues.
Suicide is an illness, not a sin. Nobody just calmly decides to end their life by suicide and burden his or her loved ones with that death any more than anyone calmly decides to die of cancer and cause pain. The victim of suicide (in all but rare cases) is a trapped person, caught up in a fiery, private chaos that has its roots both in his or her emotions and in his or her bio-chemistry. Suicide is a desperate attempt to end unendurable pain, akin to one throwing oneself through a window because one’s clothing is on fire.
Many people feel awkward and nervous when first spending time with a suicide bereaved person. It will take some time to learn how to respond. It is okay to feel awkward but you don't need to let it prevent you showing support.